What Your Coffee Order Says About You (According to Nobody)

A totally unscientific but fun look at coffee order personalities. Mostly an excuse to talk about coffee.

This is not a real personality test. There is no science behind it. But if you've ever judged someone based on their coffee order, you're not alone. Here are some observations from someone who has logged over 200 coffees.

Black coffee: the minimalist

You like things simple and you're slightly proud of that. You've probably told someone 'I just like the taste of coffee' at least once this week. You're easy to shop for and hard to impress. Your Treatly entries are all 4s and 5s because you only go to places you trust.

Oat milk latte: the modern regular

You care about your choices without being annoying about it. You've tried every milk alternative and settled on oat because it actually froths well. Your Instagram aesthetic is 'effortlessly curated.' You have a go-to order at 3 different shops and you're loyal to all of them.

Mocha: the honest one

You like chocolate and you like coffee and you see no reason to choose. People have judged you for this and you don't care. You might be the happiest person in the coffee shop. Your Treatly is full of mochas with the occasional hot chocolate mixed in.

Seasonal special: the adventurer

You try every limited edition drink the day it drops. You photograph it for the aesthetic. Sometimes it's amazing, sometimes it tastes like candle wax. But you always try it because what if this is the one? Your Treatly has the most variety of anyone you know.